


Sacrifices to a God

by Blue_Night_Blossom



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, God of Magic, Resigned Merlin, Sacrifice, Scared Merlin, Self-Sacrifice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-17
Updated: 2021-03-22
Packaged: 2021-03-26 15:47:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30108312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Night_Blossom/pseuds/Blue_Night_Blossom
Summary: The forest calls Merlin in a full moon and he answers. He arrives at an abandoned temple, his heart beating in his chest.In another timeline he didn't answer and everything went spiralling down. Now everything is well… till his magic tells him what he has to do.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 49





	1. The Call

**Author's Note:**

> You can skip the cursive if you want because it's the summary of the series.

There was a full moon above Camelot and everything was uneasy. The guards shifted in their posts, the animals growing restless. The people of Camelot sought refuge inside their homes, not wanting to tempt whatever deity reigned at that time. Gaius sighed, knowing what this night would bring, having experienced it once before. The King hadn’t heeded his warnings and one day it might be his downfall. He prepared himself to pray all night, hoping for Him to be merciful.

None of them saw the shadow slipping away, invisible to all but to the Old Gods. Merlin always had more energy on full moons and chalked it up to his magic, but this time it was different. He felt a pull in his gut and followed it. Magic was in the air surrounding him, singing inside his bones. He felt the magic as fire inside his veins, wanting to be called forward. He wanted to be one with the magic, loosing himself to her, but first he needed to follow the pull.

He arrived at a clearing and the pull disappeared. Merlin looked around, finding old ruins of what looked to be a magnificent temple in years past. He moved forwards hesitantly, not wanting to disturb the magic in the air, but each step he took made the magic sing with joy even harder.

The second he stepped inside the temple Magic swirled around him, as if welcoming home. Merlin’s eyes glowed brighter, blue eyes reflecting the bright skies of ancient days, a colour lost to men, while his heart was beating harder in his chest.

He moved through the ruins in silence, something inside of him saddened with the decay that the temple was in. He reached the altar and saw a rock figurine behind it. Merlin felt the statue call him, but he knew that, ruins or not, this was a temple and he had to be respectful.

He didn’t think much because his magic was dying to be used, it was physically hurting him. Merlin’s eyes glowed gold and fresh fruit was on the altar along with some candles. He approached cautiously, trying to gauge if the deity would demand more, but the magic was pushing him forward eagerly.

He bowed his head a little in respect but didn’t slow down, something primal calling him towards the statue. He raised a hand and the world seemed to slow down. When he made contact his mind was filled with information and he knew what to do.

This place was sacred once, and it was going to be renewed. Merlin sucked a breath and willed into existence a knife that hadn’t graced the Earth in many millennia. Merlin smiled unsurely and grabbed the hilt from where it was hovering and paused for a second, thinking about all of his friends. Morgana, Gwen, Lancelot, Arthur… he had to do this, but at what cost?

The deity demanded a sacrifice and he fit the bill. His magic begged to do it, but he was scared of what Arthur would do when they found his body in the altar of a magical temple. He would assume that magic did this and his hate for magical things would only grow. He didn’t want that. Arthur wouldn't last a day without him, Gaius loved him, his mother would be heartbroken and Morgana was starting to realise that she had magic, and if she didn’t control her powers she would…

Magic grew impatient and his own magic buzzed in his ears in a reassuring manner. His magic hadn’t lied to him before so he decided to trust her. He took a deep breath and moved toward the altar. He moved the fruit to the side and looked at the candles, their flame higher than before. He hesitated again, wondering why he needed to do this. Magic swirled but Merlin didn’t budge, waiting for an answer. The Old Gods smiled at the stubbornness presented to them and agreed to his demands.

Merlin felt the air change and an ancient energy entered the clearing. He felt himself rise in the air and he was assaulted by visions of what would happen if he hadn’t appeared in the temple that night.

He saw Lancelot refusing to go back to Camelot after rescuing Gwen because he thought that Arthur was in love with her and would treat Gwen better instead of staying as a high-ranking guard under Uther’s nose and courting Gwen. After the troll he saw himself sick with a fever that made him bedridden and this time managed to evade.

In another plane of existence, the Gods were nodding in approval, he needed to do this now or the opportunity would be lost forever.

Then the future came: _the Witchfinder, Morgause, Freya, Lady Vivian, Alvarr wanting to steal the Crystal, the sleeping spell and himself poisoning Morgana, freeing the dragon, his father being alive, the search for him and his subsequent death, Morgana returning and putting Mandrake root under Uther’s bed making him mad, the serket’s sting, the undead army, the goblin possessing Gaius, meeting Gwaine, the Crystal Cave, Princess Elena, meeting Elyan for the first time, the Fisher’s King quest, Alice, Morgana framing Gwen of enchanting Arthur and his disguise as Dragoon, Gilli, the Cup of Life’s fiasco, Morgana taking over Camelot, the Round Table, taking back the Kingdom, Agravaine’s appearance, Morgana tearing the Veil and Lancelot’s sacrifice, Uther’s death and Arthur’s grief, Aithusa, King Caerleon’s execution and Queen Annis, the Fomorroh, Alator, the Lamia._

_Lancelot’s spirit, Gwen’s banishment, Elyan’s encounter with the druid boy and Arthur’s confession, Princess Mithian, Morgana’s second attack with Agravaine’s treason, Tristan and Isolde, Excalibur, Isolde’s death, after three years Mordred appearing, the Euchdag (Diamar), Mordred’s knighthood, the horn of Cathbhadh, helping Princess Mithian with his father’s hostage, The Disir, the Dark Tower, enchanted Guinevere poisoning Arthur and blaming Merlin, Daegal’s death, the Dolma’s disguise and saving Gwen, Alator’s death, Finna’s sacrifice._

_Morgana declaring war, Mordred healing Kara, Merlin looking the other way, Kara trying to kill Arthur and being captured, Mordred helping her escape, being captured again, Kara’s death, Mordred’s escape, Morgana discovering Emrys’ identity, Morgana sends the Enacanah under Merlin’s bed to be attacked and losing his magic, Arthur deciding to fight at Camlann, Merlin telling Arthur that he wasn’t going to go with him (and how did it hurt), Morgana forging a sword made of dragon’s breath and giving it to Mordred, Gwen accompanying Merlin to the Crystal cave, Morgana’s trap and her trapping him with a rockfall._

_His father appearing and telling him that he cannot lose his magic because he is magic, getting his magic back, using the crystals to speak with Arthur in his sleep, blasting the rocks to make an exit, the battle, Merlin blasting enemies, driving Aithusa away, Mordred stabbing Arthur, Mordred dying, Merlin saving him, the magic confession, Arthur’s hurt, Gaius’ verdict, Gaius leaving with the Royal Seal, Eira’s death, Percival and Gwaine’s travels, Gwen discovering Merlin’s magic, Morgana torturing Gwaine with a Nathair and dying, Arthur’s forgiveness, Morgana’s death, Arthur’s death, Merlin’s grief, calling Kilgharrah, throwing Excalibur into the Lake and Arthur’s funeral. The hundreds of years that passed without Arthur by his side._

Merlin returned to the present in denial, not wanting to believe what would happen, but his magic hadn’t lied to him, always telling him the best way to go. He looked at the knife still in his hand and looked sadly towards the direction of Camelot. He smiled sadly and basked in the comfort of his magic while he laid on the altar. He raised the knife slowly, glinting in the moonlight, and forced his hand to stop trembling. He saw his life pass in front of his eyes, the things he wanted to do, the people he had met, his mother, Gaius…

He let his hand fall towards his heart while looking at the clear night sky and muttering a prayer towards the Old Gods to protect Arthur. The knife pierced his heart, just as quickly disappearing into thin air, and the world stopped. The calm before the storm.

Magic rippled expanding towards all directions. The magical creatures, druids, sorcerers, every single person with a drop of magic felt it and hope bloomed in their chest. Morgana’s magic calmed down and the Lady could sleep without nightmares for the first time since Gaius draughts stopped working. Arthur woke up without any apparent reason and went to his dagger, but he felt something in his chest that was surrounding him, protecting him, something very familiar and he went to sleep right after, not noticing that all his wounds were healed, including his Questing Beast bite that normally hurt when there was a full moon. In the Isle of the Blessed, Morgause stopped concocting her plan to overthrow the Pendragons and kneeled for her God. The plan was put on hold, for the most important thing was Him.

The magical shockwave reached Gaius too, who hadn’t stopped praying all night. The old man smiled and felt hopeful for the first time since Uther’s Purge. He went to check on Merlin, knowing the lad had stronger magic than himself and he must had felt it. What he saw was an empty room. Gaius swallowed and directed his prayers to his ward’s safety, hoping that he would live to see another day.

The druids, the Catha, centaurs, fairies, gryphons, everyone started their prayers knowing the importance of this moment. Their God had returned and He would save them all.

Back at the Temple Merlin’s body was on the altar, knife wound clearly visible. Iseldir approached quietly and kneeled in front of him. He saw the knife wound and healed it, the least he could do to the young boy. He didn’t touch anything, only lighted the candles that had been blown off when Merlin’s life had ended and stood all night in vigil for the young boy’s soul. He knew what kind of sacrifice was needed, but their god would come back thanks to the brave young man, because he was a boy no longer. His sacrifice would be remembered for centuries to come; he would make sure of it.


	2. A God is Reborn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merlin finds what he was missing all his life.

Merlin’s eyes snapped open. He wasn’t in the forest, there wasn’t a temple nor a clearing. Darkness surrounded him, nothing could be seen. He felt cold, the only source of heat being his magic. He didn’t know where he was.

He managed to start walking but he didn’t have the end in sight, everything was the same, endless darkness. He kept walking what he felt like hours, never surrendering. He needed to know what had happened to everyone after he had stabbed himself. He wanted this path to stop and reach his destination, he wanted for the cold to stop, he wanted his family to be happy, Arthur to be safe, magic to be allowed in Camelot, Albion to be reunited. He wanted peace and freedom.

Merlin felt eyes in the back of his head and turned around, knowing that there was someone out there. Maybe the God that he had sacrificed his body to? No, that wasn’t right, there seemed to be more than one person looking at him. He kept walking towards where he sensed the presences but they kept evading him. He was tired of everything and his patience was wearing thin. He wanted to see.

Merlin closed his eyes and concentrated on his magic. It was different, his core brimming and depleted at the same time. He had read the theory of magical cores and even with the little he had managed to find he knew that it wasn’t good. He decided to wing it and said the spell.

“ _Leoth_ ” There wasn’t even a spark, his magical core didn’t budge, it was like he was disconnected from his spells. He tried again. “ _Leoth. Leoth. Leoth, Leoth!._ ”

Merlin sat down, he didn’t know why his magic didn’t work in here when he felt his magical core even more than ever. He was frustrated, not being able to do magic, lost in this never-ending darkness and he just wanted to be able to _see_!

He blinked repeatedly, light filling his vision. He looked around not understanding everything and he saw a woman sitting in front of a loom making a tapestry. Next to her was a man with stag’s antlers on his head, and they both smiled at him. Merlin knew who they were. He didn’t know how, but his names were familiar like his own.

“Fate, Cernunnos, to what do I owe this pleasure?” Merlin wanted to be scared, he had just disrespected ancient gods and no one lived to tell the tale, but he felt calm.

“We have been waiting, Emrys.” Cernunnos spoke calmly. “You were called here years ago, but you couldn’t make it, so we tried again.”

“But magic called me here, not you.” Merlin asked, trying to understand everything, not even registering the use of a name not his own.

“We asked magic if it could call you because you were needed.” Fate answered. “I thought you wouldn’t come, so I already prepared the tapestry. It was full of death and destruction. But now that you are here I have to undo it. Destiny has changed, and so have I.”

“So the vision I have seen, all the deaths, the injustice…” Merlin felt hope bloom in his chest because the vision may yet not come to pass.

“Exactly, and it’s your responsibility.” Cernunnos smiled at him.

“Why me?” Merlin was confused and only wanted to know. “And whose temple did I die in?”

“You don’t know?” Cernunnos raised his eyebrow but Merlin didn’t felt intimidated, Gaius was scarier. The god glanced at Fate “You should understand soon, after all your fate is going to be in your own hands.”

“My fate is to unite Albion. If I have my fate in my hands, will I ever manage it?” Merlin was scared of the consequences of his choices. In the alternate reality, the one that Fate was undoing right in front of his eyes, his choices cost him everything. Who was to say he wouldn’t do the same in this one?

“You won’t be alone.” Cernunnos spoke clearly. “And you will make it. You never give up, that’s one thing I have always admired in you.”

“I’m…” Merlin was about to comment that his life was less than a blink for the god, but then he remembered that he was immortal according to the vision. Wonderful, one more problem to the already increasing pile.

“You’ll understand soon, Emrys.” Merlin frowned again and asked the question that had been in the back of his head at hearing the name.

“Who’s Emrys?” Merlin had seen visions that had the name, but those were really unclear. “The name is familiar and strange at the same time.”

“As it should be.” Fate had almost finished undoing the tapestry. “Sit down before I finish or you will fall.”

Merlin obeyed and sat down on a comfortable chair that appeared out of nowhere and watched the god’s faces fill with confusion and then amusement. He didn’t have time to ask, because Fate had undone the last thread.

Merlin waited for something because Fate had warned him that he was going to need the chair and nothing had happened. He was about to open his mouth when he felt it. Something foreign yet familiar. Something that he had missed dearly without knowing. Light started enveloping him and Fate and Cernunnos watched stoically till he was completely surrounded.

“He is more powerful than ever.” Cernunnos made the observation and Fate smiled.

“He is. He will make things right.” Fate disappeared to keep a look on the tapestry and Cernunnos was left alone with Merlin, with Emrys. He revised Emrys’ life as Merlin. He had always had a connection with animals and forests. The Lord of the Wild Things smiled at the way his domain responded to Emrys and waited for the process to be complete. The more powerful more time, and Emrys was the strongest to date.

After several days, but only some hours in the mortal world, Emrys lowered himself and Cernunnos lowered his head towards his senior.

“Cernunnos, how many times do I have to tell you that it’s not necessary for you to bow?” Emrys walked towards him and Cernunnos had to straighten himself. The power was rolling in waves from him and was intoxicating.

“I think today is an exception, Lord Emrys.” Cernunnos bowed again and Emrys hugged him.

“It’s good to see you, child.” Emrys ruffled his hair and smiled kindly. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, Uncle.” Cernunnos turned himself into a child and hugged Emrys hard. Since his birth he had a deeper connection with Emrys than with the other gods and considered him a father figure. “What are you going to do now?”

“I’m going to return to my mortal body.“ Emrys smiled at his nephew’s frown. “I need to go, my soulmate awaits me, young one.”

“You found him?” Cernunnos smiled at his nephew. Every god had a soulmate in another god, but Emrys’ one was destined to be mortal.

“I have.” Emrys smiled, remembering blue eyes as clear as the sky. “When Uther attacked my people he destroyed my main temple in the Isle of the Blessed. My secondary temples were abandoned. I tried to help but I became mortal in the process.”

“I know Uncle, I tried to help whenever I could but unless the druids or sorcerers were in my domain I was powerless.” Cernunnos had blessed the druids, not wanting his uncle’s people to disappear.

“The prophecy will come to fruicticion soon.” Emrys smiled and Cernunnos smiled back.

“No one has heard the full prophecy.” Cernunnos stated. “Only Fate knows some, but Destiny is tight lipped about it.”

“The prophecy states that I would become mortal, find my soulmate and return magic to the land. My soulmate, the Once and Future King, would unite Albion.” Emrys smiled, remembering how Arthur had shown great potential.

“I’ll miss you.” Cernunnos hugged him. “But I know this will make you happy.”

“It will, young one.” Merlin patted his head. “We better call the Council to tell them of my plans.”

“Dadga will be relieved.” Cernunnos smiled evilly. “He has been struggling with the combined pressure of his responsibilities and yours.”

“Well, let’s call them then. We will have things to explain.” Emrys smiled and laughed at his nephew’s pout.

Emrys called the rest of the gods to the Council. They were overjoyed at seeing him again and talked about his plans. None of them were happy that he was going to return to his mortal body but they understood. The Gods were lucky that their soulmates were gods themselves, but Emrys’ was predestined to be born a mortal. They didn’t grasp the concept, but they understood a fraction of the pain and that was enough to respect his decision.

Emrys hugged Bridgit and Danu, clasped hands with Lugh, Belenus, Taranis and Toutatis, smiled at Epona and Morrigan and exchanged some words with Ogma.

When he was alone, Emrys closed his eyes feeling the magic in the world. Uther hadn’t eradicated, just caused it to hide better. Emrys saw every magical person that was being hurt by the oppression and smiled. He would help them soon. Right now he needed to return to his body and return to the castle. 

Destiny wouldn’t forge itself and Emrys was determined to help everyone he could.

In the Temple, Iseldir was still maintaining a vigil. The sun was starting to rise and light was entering the clearing. The second the body was hit it was surrounded in a blinding white light. Iseldir tripped in his haste of running away. Then he remembered where he was and composed himself, waiting for a signal from Emrys. He would not fail his God.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarification: In the timeline that won't happen (the show) Merlin doesn't go to the Temple even thought he was called (once when he was young and this one) so he didn't become the God of Magic. In that case, the prophecy on the show was the valid one, but in this timeline Fate destroyed it because Merlin became Emrys, thus changing the prophecy.  
> In this timeline the real prophecy is the one that Emrys tells Cernunnos.
> 
> Please comment! Your comments made me write this chapter, even when this story was going to be an one-shot.

**Author's Note:**

> Please, give kudos and comment! They help me improve a lot and it's always interesting to see people give feedback.


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